P.O.D. – When Angels and Serpents Dance

Sony 2008

Rating: 1/10

When Angels and Serpents Dance is a blast from the past, and not in a good way; rather, more a fetid, stagnant rank draft of the nu-metal that so unfortunately ruled rock radio in the late ‘90s and the beginning of the new millennium. P.O.D. was the scene’s resident Christian “rock” band, combining heavy bass, distorted riffs, and syncopated rhythms with singing/rapping about God, loving God, and finding God.

A short listen to When Angels and Serpents Dance finds that little has changed. The guitars are still defiantly de-tuned, the singing is still mostly consisted of screaming and angsty yelps, and the lyrics still sound like they come from a demented hymn.

“Addicted” rips off the chorus melody from their earlier hit “Alive” and sounds exactly like it could have come from 2000. “Shine With Me” contains such cringe-inducing lyrics as “shine with me like the beautiful star you are” and Bob Marley-esque sentiments like “one love.” There’s even a whole verse where vocalist Sonny Sandoval just sings “la la la la la la la,” etc. Seriously.

The music is meat-and-potatoes rock pioneered by bands such as Nickelback and ape P.O.D.’s “influences” shamelessly: “Condescending sounds like Rage Against The Machine’s “Killing in the Name Of” if written by a Christian band. The band’s one exploration, the reggae-tinged “I’ll Be Ready,” is derailed by Sandoval’s uninspired lyrics and fake-Jamaican accent. Simply put, those kinds of things just don’t work.

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